Burning bridges Baby,

Thursday, April 30, 2009 3:23 AM

Hello! I'm back here, like Finally, thanks to Labour Day. I've been resisting the temptation to even steal a glance at my computer-.- & giving myself so much stress, sending myself to exile like what, Albert Einstein's world? Lol. I'm just grumbling. Nevermind. Seriously, i realise i really really need to buck up alot. It's only till the very last minute that i realise that thre's so much more i need to know. (& like Oh what's that Weirdo MrW's gna set, Curse his Emaths paperI.)

Sigh. Too much stuffs to fill me in, i'm feeling like an inferior, wretched, uncapped bottle right beneath a running tap. Losing time. Losing energy. Losing motivation. Okay, maybe not for Amaths. For whatever's sake, i'm must keep that A. Even if that meant F9 fr Chem. Gah, that PaperI was horrendous too! /: I'm starting to sound pathetic. Does anyone empathise?

" What you know is not little, what you don't is immense. "

Go Litong.

I quarrelled w my Dad again that day.

Shucks, our characters clash. /: And my mom & maid... It's getting worse by day.

Sigh, I hate it.

Thursday, April 23, 2009 2:53 AM

SANDRA GOH MING XING!
SUPERSTAR LAOHU JIAYOU FOR TMR OKAY. :D
DON'T BE TOO STRESSED OUT,
GO ALL OUT FOR IT AND DO YOUR BEST.
EMBRACE YOUR STRENGTH
& UNLEASH THE FULLEST OF YOUR POTENTIAL!
相信你自己，别被困难屈服.
我们对你有信心!!

GO CAPTAIN!
GO SIYI, GO LYDIA,
GO JOYCE, GO JIEYING!

GO 毅道！

2:53 AM

BEWARE.

If you can't take surprises, can't stand long lashes,

please do not attempt this post further. ;D

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THIS IS MAJOR AND IT'S THE LATEST GOOD NEWS THAT YOU MUST KNOW.

YISHUN TOWN DANCERS GOT GOLD WITH HONOURS IN THE RECENT SYF CENTRAL JUDGING! ;D

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The Process-

The Expectant Day.

I couldn't concentrate during mother tongue lesson. I was V restless and my mind couldn't help but drift somewhere else. Somewhere where I can convince myself that we'll overcome all odds, prove the others wrong and attain the Honours~ ;D It's the first time i experienced the exact feeling of what they say waiting in agony. It's hell. I felt much worse than pre-performance for last year's YT concert. Miss Pou and Mdm Zhang reached school at around 5plus. Their presence at the foyer made us rush to receive the verdict, and before that, Peiyi gave me tissues. Yes. Haha. Our juniors were behind us, there were squeals/conversations, but i couldn't focus on anything else until i step into the studio. Veron and I kept exchanging glances. We both knew what we had in mind. It's either another history or a breakthrough or worst case scenario, disappointment. Moreover, Choir, Drama and Band knew their results before us. The stress level was up to the brim after knowing that they maintained their Silver.

What will Dance get?

Not many were positive of us attaining a Gold. But ironically, everyone wanted to know what we achieved. ( I was bombarded with messages exactly at Five.) Haha. Initially, the teachers lied and said we got Silver. The juniors didn't believe but at that moment, i really fell for it. After that Miss Pou said, alright the truth is we got Gold. My entire row of sec4 dancers were expressionless. It wasn't what we fought so hard for. And It's not that we're not contented, but we believed that we could have done much better. The juniors went to pester YungShee for the actual results because fr some reasons, she knew it earlier than us. Then more juniors came in and started shouting Gold With Honours for countless times. I thought they were trying to add salt to my wound but then, as we turn to look at Zhang Lao Shi, She was hopping around and said YES! We are one of the two schools who got Gold With Honours for the 1st day of Competiton! ;D And guess which school? NANYANG GIRLS. (: Omg, i was stunned, overjoyed, very touched! And then i started crying and laughing real hard. I never had that kinda mixed feeling before yknow. Not once. It was indeed memorable. Live up to the GWH, Dancers! Yay. I think this euphoria's gonna last me weeks.

PS : Ey. Whoever dares to tease at our dance again,

it just shows your shallowness. [[[[:

Friday, April 17, 2009 8:30 PM

Freaking LG phone, can't you make my life easier?! ):

I can't transfer music from the pc to my phone and i'm very fedup with idkw.

Don't torment me like this, i need Music! And this viewty is driving me crazy.

I'm feeling so hopeful now. We had rehearsals at UCC today and thre was approx 5 instructors who came to watch us and give us comments. (Not forgetting many of our Ex-seniors too!) And the best and only console i got was when they said we are near to attaining the Honours! Man, it was incredibly touching. I almost cried when Liang Lao Shi said that he knew where each and everyone of us was positioned and that we make him proud. I'll really miss Liang Lao shi. (: Oh, and and Miss Tan Lay Moi came back too! One thing she said that really boosted my morale was "For the sec4s and 5s, this could be your first major competition and also your last dance. Gold with honours is just an aim, but what really mattered is, you dance because you have a passion for it and you want to show it. "

I don't know if this will be my last dance. But currently, i guess the odds are against me. Unless my grades shoot up and i can convince my mom to allow me to take part in Teachers' Day Audition without letting her worry, i don't think it'll be possible for us to stand on that beautiful stage again. Though i REALLY, REALLY want to! I told a friend that day, that i almost had a tiff with my mom over this matter. It's silly i know, and i know my mother's simply trying t guide me the right way, but the urge to perform again is overwhelming. It makes me feel very down and somewhat depressed when it dawned on me that dancing days are over. At times, i think dance brings me freedom that every adolescent desires. Even if i'm stuck at home sister-sitting and can never feel more bored than ever, i know there's something i can do to trace back the freedom. Turn on the music and dance like nobody's business. (: Looking back, it's been so fast. And one thing that i'm certain about is that Dance will always be a part of me. Just a simple comparison with who i am in primary school and who i am Now, you'll see the conspicuous contrast. I'm so much wild in primary school. Lol, I ONCE FIGHT. Dance and Music shaped me into the one you see now, and through all these years of dancing, even though to be frank i still need more time than the others to grasp some of the moves, i'm still glad that i've joined Dance. No more stage frights, more courage to pursue, and more willing to reveal. Ahem, reveal the Talent. ;D

So my dearest juniors, what i want to say is, believe me. Believe that you can make wonders. The passion is the first thing you need to get everything right. Find it, and live your life to the fullest as a dancer who's proud to be one. I'll really miss all of you after the last moment we share on stage! D':

The Last Lap.

3:37 AM

Dance with your heart and your body will follow. (:

Monday, April 13, 2009 10:38 PM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PEIYI! [[[[[[[:

-140409-

6days to syf. Dance training : Motivated yet Speechless.

There is no happiness except in the realization that we have accomplished something.

Girls, do you see the importance in this syf? Do you see the 4 consecutive golds before us? Do you see how much effort our seniors put in, how much sacrifice they made, before Yishuntown dance has the reputation it has today? Do you see how much it'd have meant to you, if you truly have the passion for dance? Do you see that this chance comes only once every two years? Do you see, that the whole school's looking up to us, waiting for good news? We're not doing this just for ourselves and the glory that we want, we've to do this and have a clear conscience that we've done our best and the result would be the best that we can achieve. There's no limitations to the possibilities, there's only limitations to the effort you're willing to put in. I know everyone's lethargic, dancing the same old stuffs each training, same old routine for warmup and all, but it's thru these littlest things that'll reveal how ready you are, right? Liang laoshi's leaving, we know it well that our result would be the best accomplishment for him, Gao laoshi, Mdm Zhang, Miss Pou and ourselves. Show what you've got, you've the thing! ;D Nobody is perfect, but we can strive to stay close to it. Rmbr, Winning isn't everything, but wanting to win is. What news do you want on the 22nd?

" Who knows what miracle you can achieve, when you believe, somehow you will. (: "

人有无限的可能，加油‘高原女人’们！

Wednesday, April 8, 2009 10:43 PM

It's 9th April- Happy birthday Ruijing! (;

I came to blog specially fr you, you're welcome. Eheheh.

Today's a significant day.

I did something that i have never done my whole life and i'll never do it again? Sounds serious huh, but not really. I was late for school. My badge was stripped off. I'm exaggerating, it wasn't that extreme, but my junior came forward and asked it from me infront of many other late people. So, it kinda meant alot. It's okay, me to blame. There won't be another time anyway. Lol, Ms Leow said it'll be my lesson learnt, (Actually she's just grumpy cause she called me twice, but my phone was accidentally set as flight mode. Don't laugh.) Haha, but of course! Studied fr the freaking tests today till around 2 in the morning. Woke up at like 720, bad hair day, sulked. Horrible. The thing about late wasn't just about the humiliation, it's the heat out there! It's unbearable. I told Monica previously that 'Uh, there's breeze out there!', and i take back those words. Global warming's taking its toll on us, best punishment.

I was saying i studied fr test and woke up late right? Yah. Peiyi said i shouldn't slog so hard, it'll have side effects. And with all the people walking by, giving us those inexplicable looks during the test, i really couldn't focus today. (Did i mention thre was also another person sitting 3inch beside me, shooting furtive glances at my paper? Rocks man.) ---

But still, today's memorable! Haha. Not that i encourage it, but i've friends like yongqing and kuanyi with me. When you know you aren't alone, you'll come to realise it isn't all that bad. (: Most of all, we weren't under supervision! Here, clue. I was hungry before lessons start, and i wasn't hungry after Mr Woo's lesson. ;DDDDD Yongqing taught me how to sing the Battle song too!

Hahah, okay as for all, i think i'm considerably a happy lark today. I felt like a child again, well or maybe sec1 again? Those cheerful days, teasing friends etc. We were excused for Pe and nafa for the last period, which supposedly turned into a self study period, but it was unofficially cancelled. Uh, then i headed somewhere with kuanyi and we had a good talk/ meetup. Lol, not that we don't see each other in school but sometimes there aren't much opportunities for us to chitttchattt. (: We talked bout swimming, dance, scary strangers. lolll. And we met Daniel at Kfc, Lydia at the interchange ;D She was craving for steamboat. Makes me hungry too. Lol. Sandra, Lydia, Siyi, Joyce, Jieying, Shermaine, Weili, Huimin and all the other 'B' girls, Jiayou for the following matches in the Nationals! Really hope to see the match one day. Haha.

Dad, Mum and my sisters went to Tzuchi to support my dad today. Supposed to perform handsigns for the event today. Cos my dad was in charge, he wanted us to perform too, but the last minute notice was rejected by our sigu-in-charge. Heh, we're so wanted-.- We've another one coming on the 19th. ;D Oh man, one day before SYF. Ah, scary. Come to think of it, i'll have to remember to send in the savings i collected before the coming SYF. Mum told me once that praying brings hope, not superstitious but i've been doing that every night with sincerity! Hopefully, we'll attain the desired after all the perspiration and effort. Mr Tan seemed to be carrying v high hopes on us. Go dancers! (: (Yaye, Prettie'll be coming for our rehearsal at UCC on the 18th. ;D)

I read Becky's blog that day and she sort of addressed her coming 'A levels' that it's all up to the mental state, "I can do anything as long as I have the courage to dream and the will to pursue it." Woah, i like that! But seriously, your little sister here's lacking of all the motivation i need at this crucial moment. Midyears might not be a big thing to many, but i know it deep down that if i don't do well for it, i'll be even more deprived of the courage to move on and absorb all the knowledge that's needed. 3days after SYF and MYE starts, it's seemingly far but yet so near. I feel all the pressure but i aren't making progress or pushing myself enough. Mdm Ho wanted us to do newspaper reflection on the setback article that day. I remember fervently that i once scored for motivational free topics like this, but now, i couldn't even get the words out right. It's true then, i'm not even hyped up and ready, what makes me in position to say that 'setbacks are just part and parcels of life, move on'? How contradicting. I used to enjoy talks by Mrs Gopala and Mdm Ho, and Miss Pay too, but now, nothing seemed to take effect on me. I only mug when there's tests. -.- Then, teachers, please give me tests individually. HAHA, no!! Kidding.

They're coming home soon! Lol. I have the sudden urge to visit my violin and practice my exam scales, which reminds me of ZARCHI. Ho, tmr's good friday, and I get to SLEEP WELL! ;D

PS : Tan Li Ying, i know you came to tag me. Don't act. Hee. (:

Friday, April 3, 2009 11:19 PM

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When all you got to keep is strong,

Move along, move along like I know you do.

And even when your hope is gone,

Move along, move along just to make it through.

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Had a nice long talk through the night with a friend yesterday.
Conversing with you was always nice- We never run out of topics to talk about and it's almost like we've known each other forever. Probably because of the immense things we share in common, or simply because we knew we could confide in each other. Well, I believe there's much more to it. Thanks for everything. ;D I must admit that you're always the friend who makes me realise alot of things. And most definitely, i'm behind you in your pursue for 'Classified'!

SYF trainings getting longer &tougher.

The will's needed, both physically and mentally.

Two more weeks! let's leave a legacy-

The first step you take is the longest stride

The dream you realise is always worth the fight. (:

04.04.09